# The Aging Parent Kit

Help your parent keep control of their money.

US checklist. Allow 30 minutes to start. Bank forms and legal planning may take longer.

## Print this checklist

- [ ] **Ask first.** “Could we do a few safety checks together? You choose what changes.” Agree that asking for help will not bring a lecture.
- [ ] **Add a trusted contact** to brokerage accounts. Ask each bank about this option. Your parent chooses the person. This gives no spending authority.
- [ ] **Turn on account alerts** for withdrawals, transfers, low balances and account changes, where available. Agree who receives them and who checks.
- [ ] **Freeze credit** at all three credit bureaus. It is free. Keep recovery details somewhere your parent can find.
- [ ] **Simplify payments together.** Ask about lower transfer and cash limits. Disable unused payment features. Keep everyday spending workable.
- [ ] **Set up call screening or spam filtering.** Save important contacts. Practice checking voicemail. Caller ID can be faked.
- [ ] **Protect the phone number.** Add a PIN to the mobile carrier account. Keep the number off public profiles.
- [ ] **Protect the mail.** Collect it promptly. Arrange a postal hold when away. Follow up on missing statements or cards.
- [ ] **Notice changes.** Unpaid bills, unexplained gifts, missing money, isolation or pressure to sign documents deserve a private conversation.
- [ ] **Plan legal help.** Ask a lawyer about a financial power of attorney, its limits and safeguards. Your parent chooses their agent.
- [ ] **Make a pause rule.** Unexpected money requests wait for a callback to a number already known. Never share sign-in codes with an unexpected caller.
- [ ] **If money is lost,** stop contact and call the bank’s fraud team immediately. Ask to stop or recall payment. Save messages and receipts.

**Chosen contact:** __________ **Phone:** __________  
**Bank fraud number:** __________ **Next check-in:** __________

**National Elder Fraud Hotline: 833-372-8311.** Monday to Friday, 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. Eastern, except some holidays.

**Find local Adult Protective Services:** Eldercare Locator, **1-800-677-1116**. Immediate danger: **911**.

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## Why these steps help

### Start with a conversation your parent can say yes to

Choose a quiet moment. Speak privately. Start with a shared task:

> “I’m reviewing my own account security. Would you like to do yours together? You can choose what we change and what stays private.”

Ask what would help. Fewer calls. Easier bills. Someone to check an odd message. Offer one small change first.

Keep decisions with your parent wherever possible. Being scammed does not establish that someone cannot manage their money. Planning ahead can preserve their choices about future help. [CFPB guidance on conversations and planning](https://www.consumerfinance.gov/consumer-tools/educator-tool/resources-for-older-adults/financial-security-as-you-age/planning-for-diminished-capacity-and-illness/).

### A trusted contact is someone the institution can call

Ask each bank, credit union and brokerage:

> “Can I name a trusted contact? When would you call them? What would you share?”

Bank programs vary. Your parent should understand the terms and choose someone who respects their privacy. Consider a second contact in case the first is unavailable or involved in a concern. [CFPB trusted contact guide](https://www.consumerfinance.gov/documents/10239/cfpb_trusted-contacts-consumers_2021-11.pdf).

Naming a brokerage trusted contact does not let that person withdraw money, make trades or make account decisions. It does not create a power of attorney. Shared alerts, account access and transaction authority require separate arrangements. [Official brokerage trusted contact bulletin](https://www.finra.org/investors/insights/trusted-contact).

### Alerts and a credit freeze do different jobs

Open the bank’s app or known website together. Look for **Alerts**, **Notifications** or **Security**. Choose useful alerts and amounts. Ask about duplicate statements or approved access if your parent wants help reviewing activity. Avoid sharing passwords.

Alerts help only when someone reads them. Agree who checks and how to respond. Open the bank app directly or call the number on a statement when something looks wrong. [CFPB banking and alert guidance](https://www.consumerfinance.gov/archive/blog/online-mobile-banking-tips-beginners/).

A credit freeze helps prevent new credit accounts being opened in your parent’s name. Request it separately at all three credit bureaus using the links in the FTC guide. Placing and lifting freezes is free. Temporarily lift the relevant freeze when applying for credit. [FTC credit freeze guide](https://consumer.ftc.gov/articles/credit-freezes-and-fraud-alerts).

A freeze does not stop withdrawals or charges on existing accounts. Keep checking those accounts. [FTC guidance on credit and existing accounts](https://consumer.ftc.gov/articles/understanding-your-credit).

### Make payments easier to check

Together, choose the payment methods your parent actually needs. Ask the bank about available transfer limits, cash withdrawal limits and disabling unused payment features.

Agree on a pause before an unexpected payment or a gift above an amount your parent chooses. Keep enough flexibility for ordinary spending.

An unexpected caller asking for gift cards, cryptocurrency, a wire or money moved into a “safe” account needs independent checking. Hang up. Call the institution using a number already known. [FTC phone scam guidance](https://consumer.ftc.gov/articles/phone-scams).

### Make the phone quieter without cutting off useful calls

Save family, friends, doctors and other important numbers first.

- **iPhone:** Open **Settings > Apps > Phone > Screen Unknown Callers**. Choose **Ask Reason for Calling**, where available. **Silence** sends unsaved callers to voicemail. [Built-in iPhone call settings](https://support.apple.com/en-us/111106).
- **Android phones using Phone by Google:** Open **Phone > More options > Settings > Caller ID and spam**. Turn on spam protection. Use spam filtering or **Call Screen** if offered. Features vary by phone. [Built-in Phone app settings](https://support.google.com/phoneapp/answer/3459196?hl=en).

Test the setting together. Medical offices may call from unsaved numbers. Check voicemail and filtered calls regularly.

Caller ID is a clue, not proof of identity. The free National Do Not Call Registry can reduce legitimate sales calls. It does not stop scammers. [FTC Do Not Call guidance](https://consumer.ftc.gov/articles/national-do-not-call-registry-faqs).

### Protect the mail and the number behind account recovery

Collect mail promptly. Arrange **USPS Hold Mail** when away. Ask the sender about missing statements, checks or replacement cards. Store checkbooks and financial papers where visitors cannot freely use them. [Postal Inspection Service mail protection guidance](https://www.uspis.gov/tips-prevention/mail-theft).

Set a separate PIN or password on the mobile carrier account. Keep your parent’s number and address off public profiles where practical. If phone service unexpectedly disappears, contact the carrier through a known route. A stolen phone number can expose texted account codes. [FTC phone number protection guidance](https://consumer.ftc.gov/consumer-alerts/2019/10/sim-swap-scams-how-protect-yourself).

### Look for pressure and lost choices

Exploitation can involve a caregiver, relative, professional or new friend. Watch for:

- Missing money or valuables.
- Bills going unpaid despite enough money.
- Unusual withdrawals, gifts or loans.
- Sudden changes to beneficiaries, account owners or legal documents.
- Someone preventing private conversations or controlling access to money.
- Fear of upsetting someone who provides care.

A new friendship or a gift alone does not establish exploitation. Ask privately: “Do you feel free to say no?” and “Can you get to your money when you need it?” Write down specific concerns and dates. [CFPB signs of financial exploitation](https://www.consumerfinance.gov/ask-cfpb/how-can-i-tell-if-a-friend-neighbor-or-family-member-is-a-victim-of-financial-exploitation-en-1933/).

### Understand power of attorney before signing

In the US, a financial power of attorney lets a chosen agent act within the document’s authority. “Durable” means it continues if the person becomes incapacitated. The document and state law determine when authority begins and what it covers.

Consult a lawyer licensed in your parent’s state. Your parent should have a chance to speak with the lawyer privately. Ask about limits, a replacement agent, independent reviews of spending and how to change or revoke the document.

A financial power of attorney is separate from health care decision-making. It grants real authority and can itself be misused. [CFPB power of attorney basics](https://www.consumerfinance.gov/ask-cfpb/what-is-a-power-of-attorney-poa-en-1149/).

### The first hour after a loss

Start with: “I’m glad you told me. Let’s make the calls together.”

1. **Call the bank or payment provider immediately.** Use the number on a card, statement or official app. Explain exactly what happened, including whether your parent sent the payment or someone used the account without permission. Ask to stop, recall or reverse it and secure affected accounts. Recovery is not guaranteed. For gift cards, contact the issuer and keep the cards and receipts. [FTC steps after a scam](https://consumer.ftc.gov/articles/what-do-if-you-were-scammed).
2. **Stop further contact and preserve evidence.** Save messages, receipts, payment details, phone numbers and a short timeline. Do not wait until the file is complete before calling the bank.
3. **Secure exposed accounts.** From a trusted device, change exposed passwords, sign out other sessions and check recovery details. Secure email too. Use **IdentityTheft.gov** if personal information was misused. [FTC account recovery guidance](https://consumer.ftc.gov/articles/how-recover-your-hacked-email-or-social-media-account).
4. **Bring in help.** Report suspected exploitation to Adult Protective Services where your parent lives. Eldercare Locator can find the local agency at **1-800-677-1116**. Contact local police for suspected theft, threats or abuse. Call **911** for immediate danger. State procedures vary. [DOJ reporting guidance](https://www.justice.gov/elderjustice/financial-exploitation-topics), [Eldercare Locator](https://eldercare.acl.gov/home).

For fraud involving someone age 60 or older, the free **National Elder Fraud Hotline is 833-372-8311**. Hours are **Monday to Friday, 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. Eastern, except some holidays**. Staff help with reporting and referrals. They do not investigate or guarantee recovery. A family member can call for guidance. The number was verified against the official DOJ page on November 3, 2026. [DOJ hotline contact page](https://www.justice.gov/elderjustice/contact-elder-justice-initiative), [DOJ hotline services and hours](https://ovc.ojp.gov/program/stop-elder-fraud/faqs).